One of the reasons I started this blog is that I find it theraputic. As it turns out, between work, family, and cancer treatment, it seems I have little time / energy to devote to my mental health. There, that is my excuse for becoming such an unreliable blogger. Official policy and common sense prevent me from saying too much about work and / or family. In the way of cancer time / energy, here is what I have upcoming. This Thursday, I have return post op with the surgeon. Friday, I have the medical oncologist and chemo. Next Wednesday I have a consultation with the radiation oncologist and physical therapy. Then three more Fridays with the medical oncologist /chemo combo. Six weeks of radiation five days a week. More PT, more surgery to address the positive surgical margins (can be done in conjunction with reconstruction), hormone therapy for 5 years. Not sure how often and for what purposes I will meet with the medical oncologist post chemo, but I think it will be fairly regular for a time, try not to die. At some point, I coined this as the "summer of chemo" despite the fact that it began in spring and here we are at the end of summer, and it's still going on and on. September 30, will be the last round. Obviously, the treatment has taken a toll on my body, but there's a good chance I'm starting to get depressed as well. I'm so near the end of chemo that I don't see much value in looking into happy pills at this point. I don't want to deal with more side effects.
The non-depressed me might blog about yesterday and a sunny day at the pool with extended family. Midori was so precious motoring around the pool with her floatie, shouting, "I'll get it!" when someone would throw the ball. She was the first one in and half way across the deep end while I was still acclamating my toes. Did I mention she's not yet three? I haven't bothered to buy a swim prosthesis, and don't wear a wig in the pool. I think I was quite brave for a crowd of 15 - 20 to saunter around in that condition. Hell, I think I'm brave to saunter around in a swim suit period. (Sunday, 8/28 someone else asked if I was pregnant. She actually asked Midori if I was having a baby brother or sister. Mom in law placed another hex, again involving the fleas of a thousand camels. I should just place an announcement in the bulletin before the flea population gets entirely out of control. I skipped church this last Sunday.) Carter (Midori's cousin who's going on 4) asked me why I shaved my head. Only one other person wanted to talk about my head. My hair has started regrowing a tiny bit on the Taxol, and she was noticing that it's coming in blonde. I think I look like a baby bird (or a baby hare krishna). Kevin says a peach. It's kind of cute in a completely hideous way. Thank God no one tried to rub my head. No one said a word about me having only one boob. I managed to avoid the camera with the exception of two photos. We left before the pie was served. In all, it was a fun and memorable day.
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